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OFFICIAL RULES All contest entries must be submitted between March 16, 2013, 12:01 AM EST and July 19, 2013, 11:59 pm EST
– Entries are limited to once daily.
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– Winner will be selected in a random drawing from all qualified entries.
– Winner will be notified via email on July 20, 2013.
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– Winner will be announced on GypsyNester.com on or before July 28, 2013 unless initial winner is not qualified and a new drawing must take place.
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– Failure of the original winner to meet official rules or claim prize within the specified time period will result in automatic forfeiture of any prize and prize will be awarded to an alternate winner. Alternate winner will be chosen in a new drawing in accordance to these same rules.
My, how the tables have turned. I’m not going to lie, I was getting a bit of pleasure out of worrying The Spawn.
The reason for their concern was not without merit — I was about to attend Roller Derby Camp. Or as the Killamazoo Derby Darlins call it, a “Fresh Meat Event”.
My, how the tables have turned. I’m not going to lie, I was getting a bit of pleasure out of worrying The Spawn.
The reason for their concern was not without merit — I was about to attend Roller Derby Camp. Or as the Killamazoo Derby Darlins call it — a “Fresh Meat Event”.
In our never-ending quest to find quirky things to do, David and I stumbled upon an ad for a bout between the Derby Darlins and The Rockford Rage.
Childhood memories of Saturday afternoons parked in front of a black and white TV flooded both our minds. My team was the Los Angeles Thunderbirds; David’s was the Bay Bombers. Aww… good times.
Derby has changed a bit — the games are no longer staged as they were during my childhood days (though you couldn’t have convinced me of that at the time). Today’s derby is real and it is brutal.
So brutal in fact, that teams have taken to naming their bouts things like Season’s Beatings and Cinco de Mayhem. Nothing was going to keep us from seeing this!
Modern derby women are strong, bold, beautiful, determined and highly tattooed.
Too intimidated to approach a Derby Darlin’ directly, I instead spoke to one of their massive security guys. He told me he would speak with Battleaxe, a player/owner about an interview.
I was in.
At half-time, I met briefly with Battleaxe and she agreed to talk and introduce me around after the game. So we sat back and enjoyed the second half of the rock-n-rolling action.
Afterwards, basking in the glow of their 100-point victory, LadyHawk, Beverly Hells and Lily St. Smear were braced but bubbly. Even with a name like Killamazoo, The Derby Darlings were not as scary in person as I thought they might be.
Battleaxe immediately invited me to a practice where I could learn how to become a rock ’em, sock ’em Derby Girl.
Whoa. That was a little more than I had in mind, especially after I found out they call the new girls “Fresh Meat.”
Then I thought — what the heck? After all it had only been thirty years since I had last put on skates — what could possibly go wrong? I started research on hip replacement therapy — just in case — and began to psyche myself up for the big day.
I couldn’t possibly get myself into a proper frame of mind without a proper derby name. My dad came up — very inappropriately I might add — with the hysterical “Vicky Viagra” and David and I were tossing around variations of “Raisin Hell.”
Not quite feeling either of those, I decided to ask the brilliant folk on our GypsyNester Facebook Page for a brainstorming session. As usual, they didn’t disappoint.
Among my favorites: “Roni Rinkrash”, “Mama Crash”, “Boomer Babe” and “The Midlife Crisis.” But the name that gave me the courage to move forward was “Helln Hotflash” (thank you George!).
Helln Hotflash could handle anything that the Derby Darlins could dish out. Unfortunately, I didn’t have the time to get a Helln Hotflash tattoo before camp.
My new mentor, Battleaxe, hooked me up with proper equipment and let me in on a trade secret — the proper derby stance is called “Tits over Toes”. Tits over toes creates a strong center of gravity, making one able to withstand harder hits and stay solidly upright.
WATCH: Helln Hotflash in action!
Learning to fall and stop correctly is imperative in Derby action, so Battleaxe ran me through drills designed to teach me to fall and pop back up. I was great at falling — popping back up, not so much.
Derby is a hard hitting sport — and I needed show Battleaxe what Helln Hotflash was made of. Tough derby name aside, Battleaxe is only two years my junior and has a very graceful off-track demeanor. Though hard-driving and no nonsense, she was very patient and fair.
I knew she had manners because she only laughed at me AFTER she knew I had a sense of humor about the situation. It didn’t feel right to take her down with a massive Helln Hotflash block.
Carefully lining up my skates and donning the correct stance (must we repeat the name?), I bashed her with all my might.
She. Did. Not. Budge. Seriously, I went reeling in the opposite direction, almost fell on my butt, arms flailing every which-way. Apparently, this Battleaxe person wasn’t as nice as she was letting on.
My status as wuss firmly established, we moved on to the fun stuff. The notorious WHIP! The fun was slightly dampened by Battleaxe’s insistence that I perform the WHIP! safely. Jeez.
I was to skate to her in the TOT position, grip her hand and forearm, be flung across the rink to land with a Rock & Roll stop (sliding on both knees — think ’80s Hair Band) complete with arms overhead and the standard rock & roll finger position.
This was a lot to put together. I had practiced the elements separately, but the full ballet was a bit daunting. I put on my Helln face and went for it. The dance was elegantly executed until I freaked out at the end, neglected to Rock & Roll, and hit the wall at full speed. Just testing the equipment…heh.
It only took hitting the wall once to make me realize that 1) I should not hit the wall again, and 2) I might be a little too old for roller derby. Excellent reaction time is no longer in my bag of tricks.
To my credit, I did get back on the horse and complete my mission.
Happily, the Derby Darlings were easier on me than they are with each other. All in all, Helln Hotflash got off easy, considering the alternatives, and it only took me three days of great pain before I was myself again.
With a career record of 0 – 0, Ms. Hotflash has officially retired her rental skates.
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Veronica becomes “Helln Hotflash” and embeds herself with the Killamazoo Derby Darlins — not quite the brightest move for a “woman of a certain age”! She survived – barely – and it wasn’t until… CONTINUE READING >>
“Mom. You are going to get owned.” Veronica becomes “Helln Hotflash” and embeds herself with the Killamazoo Derby Darlins — not quite the brightest move for a “woman of a certain age”! She survived – barely – and it wasn’t until three days later that she was able to walk properly again! Rock & Roll!
Full-grown, twenty-something college graduates are returning home to have their parents continue supporting them due to “immaturity” or because “they just prefer the comforts of home?” And the expert’s take is that there is nothing wrong with that picture?
Jaw, meet floor. Maybe there was some mistake. Maybe the expert, wasn’t clear on her meaning. We should give her the benefit of the doubt and look at the answers she and her fellow expert gave to some other pertinent questions. After all, they are on the staff at…CONTINUE READING >>
Without a doubt the boomerang kid phenomenon is common these days, and the economy is generally cited as the reason.
But recently we came upon an article in the Times Herald-Record, entited Tips From Experts on ‘Boomerang Kids’ by Brenda Gilhooly, that offered advice on several other situations involving adult offspring returning to the nest.
Let’s take a look at what the experts had to say.
“For many of those families, adult children are returning to the roost, whether because of the economy, immaturity, health issues or they just prefer the comforts of home.
There’s nothing wrong with that, says Denyse Variano…”
We very much understand health issues — any parent would do whatever was in their power to help their offspring in that situation. And the economy could be considered a viable reason for helping a young adult get on their feet. But let’s take a look at the other half of the experts’ scenarios.
Full-grown, twenty-something college graduates are returning home to have their parents continue supporting them due to “immaturity” or because “they just prefer the comforts of home?” And the expert’s take is that there is nothing wrong with that picture?
Jaw, meet floor. Maybe there was some mistake. Maybe Ms. Variano, wasn’t clear on her meaning. We should give her the benefit of the doubt and look at the answers she and her fellow expert, Stefanie Hubert, gave to some other pertinent questions.
After all, they are on the staff at the Cornell University Cooperative Extension, and created a series called “They’re Back …. Or Never Left.” They must know more than we do on the subject.
“Q. My 24-year-old son has a part-time job but doesn’t make enough money to live on his own. Other family members are saying he’s mooching off of us, but we want to help.
A. That’s what families do for each other, and the role that a parent needs to take is to be the main support person for their child at any stage of life. But if parents have the sense that they are being taken advantage of financially, then there are important conversations that need to be had.”
Hold on, did they say “the role that a parent needs to take is to be the main support person for their child at any stage of life?” They did.
No matter if we are aging, facing our own financial difficulties, or in less than perfect health; no matter what, we are always the go to solution for any of our children’s problems? Even after they are married?
Oh. MY. Are we glad neither of these experts are our mothers-in-law!
Of course if the adult offspring are taking advantage, then a conversation is called for. Does the chat involve any discussion of actually growing up, moving out, or becoming a self-sufficient adult? Nope, those ideas are never mentioned in any of the responses given by these experts.
Instead, when a harried parent asked what to do about a full grown man who has returned to his childhood home and is “too old to punish,” they offered this little gem of wisdom: “Are you sure your child knows the rules?”
When asked if boomerang kids should pay some rent, Variano and Hubert suggest they should, but only “if the young adult has the financial capability to contribute.”
Is this the way to guide our adult children in the ways of the real world? No worries, you don’t have to pay any bills unless you happen to have extra money laying around after doing whatever you want?
Just in case the experts weren’t completely clear on their stand that no adult child should ever be expected to grow up and live on their own, the article closes with this question:
“Q. My 20-year-old daughter seems very comfortable living with us. I guess it’s just easier. She doesn’t have to work hard or do housework. Should we force her to grow up and move out on her own?”
Perhaps a resounding “YES!” would have been a good response. But it wasn’t:
“A. It’s important to recognize that there are many different reasons why adult children are staying or returning home. There is a huge difference between mentoring (giving guidance and support) and managing (doing for them or dictating what they must do). We need to be careful regarding the latter; it’s a recipe for burnout for the parents and it infantalizes adult children.”
Face, meet palm. After an entire article that never once asked any responsibility from grown children who continue to live at home with their parents, these experts have decided that those very same parents must be careful not to cause any infantile behavior.
Blue Spring is a first magnitude spring, pouring forth over one hundred million gallons of water a day, and like the springs around Crystal River, the water stays a constant seventy-two degrees year round… CONTINUE READING >>
Blue Spring is a first magnitude spring, pouring forth over one hundred million gallons of water a day, and like the springs around Crystal River, the water stays a constant seventy-two degrees year round.
So manatees love it, and many will swim miles up the St. Johns River to get to it.
As you visit Blue Springs State Park and soak in the natural wonders of Florida, you might find yourself inspired by the idea of starting your business in this dynamic state. The first step towards achieving this entrepreneurial dream is to set up a Limited Liability Company (LLC). Luckily, there are resources available that can guide you on how to start an LLC in Florida that easily helps you navigate through the process, so that setting up your business will be as joyful an adventure as your trip to Blue Springs State Park.
We took a boardwalk path up to the source of the spring and got exceptional views of all sorts of wildlife along the way.
Turtles, alligators, and any number of birds and fish, but the stars of the show were being quite shy.
The half dozen or so manatees we saw were all resting on the other side of the river from the path, so we didn’t get a very good view.
